Are You A Feminist?

The past century has seen sexism come to be one of the top ways in which one can discriminate. This was brought into question through the fact that 'feminists' decided that they were being treated unfairly and that it should stop and hence has had much publicity over recent years and has resulted in fewer instances of a woman being judged or treated differently solely based on her gender.

So women are no longer campaigning for the vote, or burning their bras or chaining themselves to railings in order to get their message out and yet feminism is still active today, and what I was asked by a self-confessed 'feminist' friend of mine recently really got me thinking; "Are you a feminist?"

It's terrible, but certain stigma has been attached to those calling themselves feminists... Still to this day they are often considered unfeminine trouble-makers. There are even ignorant people out there who would call them 'men-haters', and in extreme cases 'butch' and other similarly derogatory names implying lesbianism because some assume women only fight for women's freedom because they 'love' women and 'hate' men. Of course, this is not the case.

Feminists are women who believe that men and women should be treated equally. It's as simple as that. So yes, I guess I am a feminist. It makes me angry that for the most part men are still on higher rates of pay than women who do the same jobs. It makes me mad that men are often chosen ahead of women for jobs purely because employers don't want to hire someone who may one day require maternity leave and pay. It makes me sad that there are still such negative connotations to various words used to describe women in comparison to the equivalent for men... if you don't believe me just consider the differences between 'bachelor' and 'spinster' or 'slut' and 'player', plus there are tons more examples out there. It confuses me that women are still considered as their father's property until they become that of their husband, demonstrated by the fact that most women take on their husband's names... Mrs Dr John Doe for example, why isn't she just considered as herself? It makes me shake with rage that some people out there, including Constable Michael Sanguinetti believe that a woman should be judged and hence treated 'accordingly' based on their appearance and the way they dress. The reason this makes me shake with rage is because this Toronto Constable actually suggested that 'Women should avoid dressing like sluts' in order to lessen the chances of rape. Shocking, right?

It's amazing that in this day and age people still go along with sexist conventions purely for the sake of maintaining tradition. So sexuality is being embraced more openly these days (in the past a man would have to secretly find a prostitute if he wanted to let off some steam, whereas now he need only buy a girl a drink before he has her in his bed... or in the club car park, depending on what that girl allows of course) and yet it still remains a taboo for a woman to explore her sexuality as openly. If we have become less 'prudish' over the years, then more power to us, but let's try and make the lack of judgement one-size-fits-all... Whatever the 'rules' are, they should apply to everyone!

Personally, I am not the kind of girl who wants to go on a night out and pull lots of guys, but I would like the option to if I so chose, without being concerned about how society would consider me because I'm a woman. That's the whole point of feminism; if you want to be a housewife, then that's fine! But the opportunity to be a politician, doctor or lawyer should be there too!

So that's one case where I don't want to go to the party but it would have been nice to be asked. And yet there are other cases where I do want to go to the party... and dress like a 'slut' if I feel like it, without being raped (SO THERE, CONSTABLE MICHAEL SANGUINETTI!) For

example, I don't want to be defined by the men in my life. I'm my own person.

Since I made this revelation I have decided to take on the less conventional 'Ms.' rather than 'Miss' or 'Mrs'. 'Ms' means I am a woman and you don't need to know whether I'm taken or 'belong' to a man for you to make your opinions about who I am and what I'm capable of. It's just a small change, but I figured, 'If men don't have to declare their marital status in paperwork, then why should I?'

Also, since the 'SlutWalk' campaign which took place on the 11th of June this year I have definitely decided that I will be attending the walk next year. Thousands of women took to the streets wearing the most provocative clothes they own, baring as much flesh as they wanted and marched in the name of the importance of sexual consent. Women who have been raped, or molested in the past walked with their heads held high and those who have been lucky enough never to have experienced something so terrible supported them anyway and marched carrying banners stating 'Cleavage does not mean consent', 'Short skirts don't cause rape, Rapists do' and 'Whatever we wear, wherever we go, yes means yes and no means no'.

This made me realize that if women want to stand any chance of being treated as equals to men, we need to stand together. Just because we may not be affected by sexism right now doesn't mean we'll never face that barrier... Plus, I think feminism is cool, so we really have no

excuse!

I'm not saying every girl or woman out there should go out and wear no clothes, apply for a high powered job and introduce themselves as 'Ms.' However, we really should be more aware and understanding to those sorts of examples...

I hope I've given you some food for thought. Hopefully I will see as many of you as possible at next year's SlutWalk which can be found at www.facebook.com/slutwalkuk but until then, answer me this... Are You A Feminist?

Love and kisses

MS. gabriellasofia

Letter From the Editor: Welcome!

*My Moral For The Month...*

Dear Readers,

Finally having arrived back from what was shockingly quite a testing summer working in Walt Disney World, I am now as eager as ever to maintain my blog. My summer was incredible, really, it was.

My days off were some of the best in my life so far, and yet, Working for the Mouse taught me that when I do eventually choose my official career path, I can't just slog through five days a week just because my two days off are good fun. It has to be something which I'm passionate and excited about, something that gets me up and out of bed at the crack of dawn with a smile from ear to ear. While I was going about some menial task like using my 'Disney Point' (a two-finger point as it's apparently more polite) to direct the thousandth guest over to the Indiana Jones Epic Stunt Spectacular which was clearly sign-posted for all to see, or explaining to a guest that, "Yes, the three o'clock parade is in fact at three o'clock" I remembered the words of Liz Earle and many a wise person before her... 'If you love what you do, you'll never work a day in your life.' I wondered to myself if I had ever worked such a job and immediately my work experience at Conde Nast Traveller leapt to mind.

My next few days were spent pining over how much I adored completing even the dullest tasks when working at the magazine; organizing the travel library, handing out the post or scouring the newspapers for the latest in travel news. I started to imagine where I want next for my work experience, or where I wanted to go to study my masters in magazine journalism and how I can work towards that. Of course, the first thing I thought of was by working on my blog. A platform which I can use daily to get my written word out there is invaluable to me and almost as soon as I thought it, I actually wished to myself that I was home, blogging on an almost daily basis.

So that's what I did. I came home. I came home early and terminated my Disney International College Program, changed my flight and three days later I was back on English soil.

With a new academic year comes a new look for my blog. I want this to be almost like an online magazine, a 'blogazine' if you will. Almost daily I will post various stories from fashion pieces, to beauty tutorial videos to relationship features and all that's in between. I have even posted my schedule for the month of September, just like a 'Contents' page so you know what is coming...

But enough of that, hopefully you'll all get used to the new look and can see just how much work I'm going to be putting into this blog from now on, so please tell your friends, get involved, rate, comment, like, follow and subscribe if you can; it would be a great help! :)

The moral of this 'Letter From the Editor' is that life is too short to waste it doing something you don't want to do. Don't get trapped by the financial stability, or the pride of the people around you, or even the ease of the tasks required of you. If you do then you run the risk of spending five sevenths of your life being painfully unhappy and I wouldn't wish that on anyone. Don't be afraid to be a quitter if it's really not what you want, and don't be afraid to shoot for something you think is totally out of your comfort zone. Follow your dreams, reach for the stars. You'll thank me one day :P

Love

gabriellasofia

*What's in this month?*

2nd September - Video - Beauty - Tutorial: Sweat-Proof Make-Up

3rd September - Blog - Fashion - My Autumn Musts

4th September - Blog - Health - The Importance of a Balanced Diet and Frequent Exercise

5th September - Blog - Feature - Age Gaps in Relationships

6th September - Video - Beauty - Tutorial: The New Season Look

9th September - Blog - Beauty - Review: Lip Stain Comparison

10th September - Blog - Health - The Number-One Stress Related Syndrome in Young Adults

11th September - Video - Hair - Tutorial: The Re-Birth of the Hair Braid

12th September - Blog - Guest Feature

13th September - Blog - Beauty - Review: Clarins Eclat du Jour Range

16th September - Video - Fashion - A Mid-Month Haul!

17th September - Blog - Feature - Are You A Feminist?

18th September - Blog - Feature - Why Good Customer Service is More Vital Than Ever

19th September - Video - Beauty - Tutorial: A New Spin on the Smoky Eye

20th September - Blog - Beauty - Beauty Without Breaking the Bank

23rd September - Blog - Feature - How the Mouse Stole My Magic...

24th September -

Video - Nails - Tutorial: Disco Ain't Dead

25th September - Blog - Fashion - Who's That Girl?

26th September - Blog - Guest Feature

27th September - Blog - Fashion - How I'm Wearing the New Season's Trends...

30th September - Video - September Faves

Hope you enjoy this month's blog as much as I enjoyed writing it! What are you most excited for?

God bless

gabriellasofia

Why the Hopes and Dreams of Women Should be as Attainable as those of Men...

'Ah, so you want to work as a magazine journalist in London? That sounds fun... But what about one day when you are older and have children? London and a high-pressure career aren't ideal circumstances for raising a family. You'll have to think about that...' That's what people think when I tell them my Life Plan. They think it, but don't say it, because everyone is so scared, tiptoeing around what does and doesn't constitute anything even beginning to resemble political incorrectness. So how can I know what other people are thinking? Well, perhaps it's something to do with the patronizing glint in their eyes before they try really hard to understand or at least appear to have some level of pride in what they might see as naive ambition. Maybe it's because the pressure which women have been put under with the apparent ultimatum imposed by the terms 'Stay-at-Home-Mum' versus 'Career Woman' in the public eye. Or perhaps it's all down to the fact that I think the same.

How can any woman not feel guilt somewhere deep down inside about spending time away from her baby? Especially in search of what comparatively become selfish desires next to time with your child; money, enjoyment, purpose. Even now, years from having my first child (if the Life Plan is honored of course...) this is something which might not massively impact my career decisions, but definitely plays on my mind in my quiet moments. It's only human instinct, right?

So what about those women who have been portrayed as choosing their careers over their children? What are they like? Well, that's just the thing. Do we really know?

It's still a fact that there are many more men in high-powered, higher-earning positions than women, even now in this 21st century. As sickeningly medieval and unfair as this fact is, it stands to reason that most people don't know enough of the lucky elite of females who's talents have been rewarded with a well-deserved justly-earned management position in order to justifiably generalize what 'they' are like.

So we turn to what we watch, hear and read in the media. Surely I don't have to outline the impression that characters such as The Devil Wears Prada's Miranda Priestly, the 'Diva' caricature of famous female celebrities and even J.K. Rowling's Dolores Umbridge give the world of women in powerful career roles. Yes. I compared the three.

All joking aside, you only really hear about powerful women in the factual sense if they have done something wrong. Think about it. Newspaper headlines such as The Guardian's 'Female Boss or Bossy Female', The Daily Mail's 'Why women find it harder working for a Queen Bee rather than a male boss' and the less serious headline of the same publication, 'Hands off our heels! A tottering female boss stamps down on calls for a ban of 'dangerous and demeaning' stilettos in the office' influence the public opinion of what these women are like. Look to the most famous female leader in history, Margaret Thatcher. Are we to believe that nothing she did made a positive impact, and her quintessentially 'formidable' demeanor was the only thing worth remembering? Because that's the way it would appear.

Are all female leaders bossy bitches in comparison to the collective group of unfalteringly lovely male bosses out there? Probably not. And even if they were, could we really blame them? As if doing something for yourself, namely pursuing a career, as a woman is not hard enough not only emotionally in terms of the sacrifices you will make, but also in some cases mentally and physically (surely the exhaustion of constantly hitting the brick wall of 'you're not a man so you will have to work twice as hard to convince us you deserve this' is quite the challenge) we now also have to face and fight the fact that virtually everyone in the world of work will expect us to be vile based solely on what they are fed by the media's attempt at subliminally inducing negative bias towards our sex. I admit, even I would struggle not to expose the chip on my shoulder when an employer resigned oneself to the idea that the job would be best filled by the lucky female candidate.

I know it should be obvious. But I just want to clearly state that not all women wishing to do well in their careers are power-mad bitches. Nor are they selfish mothers. And why on God's Earth do they have to choose the lesser of two evils in order to fit into one negative stereotype or another???

In this day and age I fully believe that a woman can pursue a successful high-powered management career whilst loving and devoting herself to her family. Sure, it's not easy. I know that if one day I decide that I want it all, my life will not be as I want it to be unless I fully learn numerous skills such as time-management, prioritizing and the ability to do everything I will do with 100% enthusiasm, passion and energy. Nobody said it would be easy! What's a good life if you don't have to work hard for it? A crap life, that's what. A life where you don't appreciate the things you have. A life not worth living, I reckon.

Basically what I am saying is that I know my female readers out there are forward-thinking, intelligent, charismatic, lovely women of the future, and they know it. However, I think we need to talk about it more often! Encourage one another that we aren't just imagining our own potential, or being silly in dreaming about strutting confidently through a happy office knowing that all the people around us are working towards one common goal and that we are leading them in it...

So next time a friend tells us what she want's to do in the future, let's not smile sadly and treat the conversation like a 'What-would-you-do-if-you-had-a-million-pounds' hypothetical question game, but push her! Give her advice, introduce her to the right people and let her know that you have faith in whatever she wants to do. Positive Outcomes Only, right?

gabriellasofia